This story about Writers Block somehow veered into a little biography on how it all started for myself as a writer, True Story.
As fulfilling and exciting as it is to write blog posts, often there are periods of time in which there is a long pause. This happens when your mind wanders so much as a writer, that you don’t know quite where to begin. It’s sort of like an organizational thing, or you can say it’s a little bit of OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). Not that writing is dirty, but as an author/writer, you certainly don’t want to be all over the place with your sentences. It all should make sense to the common reader. This also may require extensive research for factual purposes, unless of course you write fiction I guess. Even then, fiction or non-fiction, a typical writer may spend hours, days, weeks, even years on certain subjects before finally mastering what it is they really want to say.
Therefore, it is a lot of work involved in being a writer, and if you stop at any point, and don’t get back to it for a long period of time, you may have encountered what is often referred to as “Writers Block.”
For me, I had writers block for nearly four years. I seemed to find a craft I was good at, and had opportunities, such as writing for two different local websites involving anything and everything with Arizona Sports. With a desktop computer at my disposal, two different writing engines to write on, and several different thoughts at my fingertips, I worked had pumping out articles left and right, and as detail oriented as I am, my articles were typically lengthy as I just tried to get to the point. I had a regular job that bled into the late hours of the night, but that did not stop me from jumping onto the computer as soon as I got home from work and spill out my guts as my fingers tapped onto the keyboard. Quick side note: Having done this, I taught myself how to type faster.
I spent many sleepless nights writing articles to posts to those websites and I wasn’t even getting paid for it. It simply just became a hobby as I have always been a huge sports fan anyway, and had been presented with avenues to get the news out on my own. I also did this knowing that I had to take care of my son and daughter who were babies at the time, as their mother was gone to work in the mornings, which meant I had to wake up early to take care of them, and drop them off to the babysitter on my way to my job later that afternoon. I don’t know how I did it, but I did. I found a passion for something, and ran with it while making sacrifices at the same time. The dream, and the drive to achieve the dream was alive and kicking for sure.
It all pretty much started one night, before my youngest daughter, middle child was born. I could not sleep, having been deep in thought on a certain topic involving my favorite NFL Football team Arizona Cardinals. So, I rushed out of bed to go downstairs. As I sat at the computer desk, I opened the Word browser and just started typing. I must have typed like 5 pages worth or something like that, can’t remember, but it was a lot. Afterwards I posted to Facebook, and went back to bed satisfied with a feeling of accomplishment. I finally had a chance to get all of what I wanted to say off my chest. It felt great. I woke up the next morning to find that I received a lot of feedback notifications, and just how gratifying it felt to know that many other people have read my article and responded back in a positive manner. I even got some negative feedback which was just fine as well. Nonetheless I discovered a hidden talent, and a new passion. It was truly a hobby I enjoyed. I even remember the excitement I felt when the two websites Phoenix Sports Kings which is no longer running, and Revenge of the Birds, a local connection to SB Nation, recruited me as a blogger. I felt as if I had finally arrived in the world despite not getting paid for my services.
Then eventually the desktop that I spent numerous amounts of time in front of started to corrode with viruses as it would run slower and slower. And despite both my wife and I having full-time jobs, it just wasn’t in the budget to pay for virus protection. On top of that, one of the websites I was writing on shut down (Phoenix Sports Kings). Not to mention, life just simply started to get in the way as my young new family just took my attention away from writing.
Safe to say, I just simply stopped writing for a long period of time which eventually led to me losing my Mojo, motivation to write. It could have also been the fact that I got burned out from those sleepless nights, while at the same time, being a father to my kids. Or it was perhaps not having the computer working properly, thus feeling a bit lost not being able to type my thoughts using my fingertips. Sure, I could have done it the old fashion way with a pencil and paper, but it just didn’t feel the same. I started many articles, but never finished them because I had lost the resources I had from writing for those websites.
This went on for four whole years. You can say I made a ton of excuses, rightfully so, as the passion never left, yet the motivation did. I spent a lot of time trying to get it back by writing poetry, but I still yearned for something more, but wasn’t sure what was stopping me. I have several notes on my phone from just being in random places and hearing things that I wanted to include in stories. But still, as I started to write them, I just stop. I started doubting myself, wondering if that flame I once had lit, had burnt out. It was very confusing because I knew that writing/blogging was something that I was good at, and I just needed to keep at it as there is plenty of wax still on the candle. For you slow folks, that meant that I have plenty of life left. Words still churning in my head with the desire to speak on them through blog form.
As much blogging as I could have done in those four years that I was away from it, you would have thought that I just maybe have given up. Sure, I came close a few times, but I just am not ready to throw in the towel as I know I can make a living off this someday. I kept faith that God gave me this gift for a reason, but maybe I was too stubborn and selfish wanting and knowing only how to do it a certain way. Nonetheless, I believe this is not over yet as the world will someday hear my word.
The Holy Bible is filled with a bunch of stories from all of Gods disciples and apostles. Did any of them have writers block? Maybe, maybe not but they still pretty much tell a good story on how life shall be lived. Well I may not be worthy to write an entire bible. I am especially no philosopher like many of those 12 Kings were, but it’s time I take this block and use it as a stone to start building my foundation as a writer, and start using my stories to build upon, while giving you as the reader a broader prospective on many different things happening in not just sports, but various other subjects as well.
You can find me on twitter at @_JayBird79
Facebook at jason.mulkey1